Monthly Archives: April 2016

Flying with a Broken Wing

Many of us learned that unless we put others first,
we would become egotistical and selfish.
We were taught to “love your neighbor as yourself.”
But did we ever learn to love ourselves? (Quantum God)

One of the first spiritual guidelines I learned (from Deepak Chopra) was that we must love ourself.

An organization for plastic surgery has been running a television commercial in which one of its customers says, “I feel pretty,” and every time I hear her say, “I feel pretty,” I respond out loud with “Good for you!”

Although a lot of this lifetime seems spent in letting go of what isn’t working well, I’m not endorsing plastic surgery. It’s the woman’s view of herself that I rejoice in. She feels good!

BelieveInYourself

Feeling good isn’t always easy, and trying to fly with a broken wing difficult but not impossible.

Spirit (with a capital “S”) supports life as long as spirit (with a small “s”) trusts that lifeline. How do we deepen our trust? By what the Sufis call remembrance of the soul. Quiet time. Prayer. Believing in ourself. And noticing moments of grace that happen every day.

This week, shall we make an effort to notice every instance of “what’s going right” and be grateful?

I am grateful for you.

love, chelle

Natalie Wood singing “I Feel Pretty” from West Side Story at

Opening a New Door

One Saturday when I was a teenager, my mom needed a can of stewed tomatoes for the meal she was preparing, and we ran over to her parents’ house. Da and Grandpa had gone out, but Mom found what she needed in the pantry closet in the basement, then sat on Da’s red stool at the kitchen counter to write a note. Both thoughtful and grateful, Mom said she had taken a can of tomatoes, added a thank you, and signed the note with love.

At that moment, Da and Grandpa came home, and Da began to chide Mom—this may have been when Da was trying to quit smoking—but Grandpa motioned us over to the other side of the room.

“Honey, come with me,” he said. He led us downstairs and crossed the cement floor to a doorway I’d never noticed before. Beyond that door was the part of the basement where “cold storage” ran the whole width of the house, under the front porch. “Look, Sandra,” Grandpa told her, his mouth curving into the lop-sided grin we loved so much, “here is where you need to go shopping.”

I felt my eyes go wide. Before us lay boxes stacked upon boxes, all full of canned goods and delicacies (like Smucker’s jams in all flavors). Mom and I drove home with a case of stewed tomatoes and more.

How often we limit ourselves to the places we know, the experiences we’re used to, the smallness we have learned to accept as ourselves. That “small me” feeling is so pervasive and so detrimental to our being! In Quantum God, Part Two, “We are willing to change,” I quote Marianne Williamson, who wrote, “Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure….[But] as we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

This week, let’s remember to shine. How? By being kind to ourselves; by thinking well of ourselves. With this simple act, we allow our whole Self to shine out, and we tacitly encourage those around us to do the same. That is when we are, as Rev. Karyn Bradley used to say, a beneficial presence. A blessing in the world.

More power you, dear heart, and many blessings as you walk through new doors.

love,
chelle

Trist—This isnt real

This Isn’t Real

A Taoist parable tells about a man who dreamed he was a butterfly. Upon waking, he asked himself, “Am I a man who dreamed he was a butterfly, or a butterfly dreaming it is a man?” (Quantum God, Chapter One, “Will you have the soup?”)

With a recent gain of 12 pounds—which amounts to 12% of my normal body weight—and everything swelling up to (but, unfortunately, not including) my bustline, I thought my death was imminent. Blood clots in both legs. Failing heart. Or failing kidney. After spending much of my life wishing I were not alive, I found I was not ready to die.

Ha! Always a late-bloomer, am I finally getting “into” life? Everywhere we turn, we can see injustice or abuse or greed that needs our attention. Our efforts. Our compassion. “No rest for the weary,” my mom used to say.

Kurt Godel, however, had another viewpoint: One part of any system cannot make a judgment about that system. Or, as Bernie Rhodenbarr in Lawrence Block’s Burglar series observed, “It’s hard to see the picture when you’re standing inside the frame.” (I’ve been reading with my feet above my heart a lot, lately.)

The movie, Divergent, contains a fascinating scene where Tris realized she was dreaming and took control of her fear and, indeed, her dream.

Is this life a dream? Although we know there is a divine realm from which we made our field trip to Earth, this life certainly feels real. Whatever it is, we’re smack in the middle of it! And if, like me before, we’re not really engaged with living, what kind of experience can we hope to create?

My friend, Chuck, calls life an adventure. Sounds a little scary to me, but he’s on the right track. We’ve got a lot of living to do!

love,
chelle

Getting Out of Bed

 The day was perfect! The sun was shining, the flowers blooming, all was right with the world…But then I had to get out of bed. ~ Anon.

 

bedAnother day came yesterday—a new day, yes? A day in which to do anything, to be anything we like?

A day dedicated, I decided, to finding joy and not indulging in fear. What’s there to be afraid of? Well, the supposed altitude sickness that affected me in Denver followed me back to Kansas, and I am still parched and puffed up all over, feet and legs and hands and face swollen, and scared. Was I dying? And it costs what, $200 just to walk into an Emergency Room? What a nightmare!

Our mother is having the greatest difficulty feeding herself, with hands misshapen from arthritis and senseless from neuropathy, and unable to transfer to assisted living quarters unless she can feed herself.

And do I still have any sort of job, any income and interaction with my Alzheimer client’s family since hospice is now visiting Pam?

These fears left me keeping company late with my pillow yesterday morning. The day, however, is what we make of it.

HopesNotFears copySo I put aside my fears and got out of bed. And do you know what? With some smiles, food, love and friendship and work, the day-gone-by looked pretty good. I was feeling grateful, which is so much more productive than feeling frightened, yes?

Today is a new day, and it is upon us! May we focus on our daytime dreams this day and every day, dear heart! And know that I leave you with

love and blessings,
chelle